Therapy Mini: Why Do I Feel Invisible Even Around People Who Care About Me?
When you’re holding everything together, it’s easy for others to see what you do... but not who you are!
The quiet ache of feeling unseen
Feeling invisible is incredibly common for carers and people living with chronic illness. Your days revolve around someone else’s needs, symptoms, routines, and emotions, while your own feelings get pushed aside, minimised, or quietly ignored. Even in a room full of people, you can feel unseen, not because you’re unimportant, but because so much of your struggle happens silently. So when your needs are invisible, you often feel invisible too.
Why invisibility creeps in
Caring is mostly made of things nobody notices:
The quiet monitoring.
The emotional labour.
The exhaustion hidden behind a polite smile.
You might hear:
“You’re doing amazingly.”
“You’re so strong.”
“You seem fine.”
But what you don’t hear is:
“How are you coping?”
“What’s happening inside for you?”
“Who’s looking after you?”
People see the role but not the person inside it, and quietly, it starts to feel like you disappear a little more each day.
How feeling invisible shows up
You might find yourself:
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Withdrawing because opening up feels pointless
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Feeling hurt when people don’t ask how you are
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Being the listener but never the sharer
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Feeling lonely even in close relationships
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Noticing that you talk about the person you care for more than yourself
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Feeling like your emotions take up “too much space”
Why it hurts so deeply
Invisible doesn’t mean forgotten, it means unacknowledged and that hurts because you still need to be seen.
You still need softness, curiosity, and care.
You still need someone to notice the quiet parts; your heaviness, your courage, your grief, your tired heart.
But when your role becomes bigger than your identity, people stop seeing the human beneath the responsibility.
What helps
Let people know what you need gently.
Try: “I could really use someone to check in with me, too.”
It’s not demanding, it’s human.
Share with someone safe.
One person who sees you can make a huge difference.
Remember that invisibility is a feeling, not a fact.
It shows you’re carrying too much, not that you don’t matter.
Therapy can be a space where you’re fully seen.
No roles, no expectations, just you being heard without apology.
A Moment to Breathe
Close your eyes for a moment and place a hand over your heart.
Ask yourself:
What part of me has been waiting to be seen?
Let that part have a moment, a breath, a bit of light, a small acknowledgement, because you deserve to take up space.
Closing — An invitation
If you’ve been feeling invisible lately, overwhelmed by caring, illness, or exhaustion, please know this: you haven’t disappeared.
You’re still here, with a story that matters and you deserve to be seen, heard, and held.
If something in this post resonated and you’d like to explore counselling with me, you can get in touch through my contact form here. I’d love to hear from you.
For Every Story | Therapy Mini Series
Therapy Minis are bite-sized blogs by Simone Bell of Simone Bell Counselling. Each post takes an honest look at the thoughts, feelings, and everyday experiences that shape us - because every story matters, including yours.